One odd thing about whatever I’m going through (depression, whatever it’s called) is that I have no motivation. None. Things I used to enjoy just don’t happen anymore.

For example, I’m a bicycle nut. Have been for years. I love to ride bikes, I love especially to get out in the country and away from cars and stoplights and lawn mowers and other things and just listen to the birds, watch for deer, enjoy being mobile. A few years back I decided the best way to share this was to buy a tandem (for anyone not familiar with the term, think “bicycle built for two.”)

So, I did. Actually, my wife did. She earned the cash that summer, working extra. And we bought a bike. A big bike. Rode it together, um, three times? Just didn’t happen.

So then I modified the bike so my kids could ride with me. Might as well share the thrill of cycling with somebody, right?

Here is my eldest and I on our first ever bike ride. This was almost three years ago, in February. This child won’t ride now, since he wants his own bicycle.

Here he is advising his brother on how to ride in the trailer.

And here we are all together. That’s 11 and a half feet of bike, folks. We do make an impression when we go places.

But there’s the problem. We don’t go places. Not anymore. Our last long ride (50 miles) was in August, 2003 (I’ll try and find pictures, they’re someplace. Damn I wish I was organized). As I said, my older son likes his own bike now, but that limits his range – no way he is going to ride 20 or 50 miles on his bike. His brother rides the back seat of the tandem, now, but not really, because I can’t get my shit together to actually ride. I always have excuses – it’s too dark, it’s too cold, it’s too hot, I need to mow the lawn, etc.

So, unfortunately, I don’t have any new pictures of us on our noble steed. And? I’m just as big as I was three years ago. Not riding isn’t helping me to lose weight, either. Hmm.