It’s Saturday night. It’s just after 10:00.

My wife and kids are asleep (or almost so), taking up our entire bed with pillows and quilts and stuffed animals and feet and hands and stuff.

I’m unable to sleep, so I thought “Hey, what a perfect chance to go catch a movie!” Now aside from the giant neon LOSER sign I’d be flashing if I went by myself on a Saturday night to see a movie (which I’m pretty OK with, it’s not like I’m out to impress anybody, especially not anybody that goes to a movie late on a Saturday night). Aside from that, I had this realization: I’ve missed the 10:00 shows, so the only ones I could see start after midnite. And I’m afraid I’d fall asleep during the movie and wind up spending the night in the theater. Cuz although I’m awake now, three or four hours from now I won’t be.

Maybe I should just go sleep on the couch. No, better – the bunk bed in the kids room is open. That way I can start my morning with a concussion when I sit up and forget there isn’t enough room to, you know, sit up.

mood: pathetic.