emma-watson

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So much more pleasant

Okay, I was all set to write another one of my “gee, I’m depressed and it’s just not shitty enough unless I share it with the intarwebs” posts, and then I realized that somebody had bumped Emma Watson from the top of my “popular pages” list.

I’ll let that sink in for a moment.

Got it? Yes, for the moment at least, there is somebody on my blog more popular than Emma Watson’s boobs. It’s Sophia Myles. Lovely lady, but I was a bit shocked. Clearly something is afoot.

Mmmmm.A little Google later, and I realize she has a new movie out, and in that movie she apparently enjoys sex (the line “I like creepy guys,” is enough to make me wanna see it right there). So the movie is called Mister Foe (click for a review at NYT) and sounds really promising.

In her loneliness, her toughness, her perfect mix of maternal warmth and sexual adventurousness, she is at heart a literary conceit, an inhabitant of that realm of the male imagination where lust and sentimentality meet and mingle. But Ms. Myles inhabits the role with such crisp and understated wit that she manages to hold such doubts at bay. Common sense might suggest that a woman in Kate’s position should change her locks, call the police or move to another town when a guy like Hallam shows up, but somehow she never seems more sensible than when she does the opposite of what prudence might dictate.

Yeah, I might have to check this one out. Of course, not at the theater by myself, that would be, well, creepy.

And this post is so much better than what you almost had today. Trust me.

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63.2%

That number? Is the percentage of people who hit my blog looking for
Emma Watson.

She’s not here. Never has been. Never will be. But you come looking anyway.

Oh, and of the others? One person looking for potato jokes, somebody
wanting to know how to get their stimulus payment (answer: they’ll
send it to you), and somebody who thinks Elmo loves dark lords.

Aren’t you glad we have the internets?

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Salute!

I just wanted to wave hi to the hundreds of visitors from the middle
east and China that are here every day looking for Emma Watson’s tits.

If it weren’t for you, I’d have virtually no visitors at all. It’s
probably a disappointment that I don’t actually have any pictures of
Emma Watson’s boobs (or anyone elses, really) but don’t let that stop
you.

*waves*

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why?

Honey, you have nothing to apologize for.

I’ve said it before: there is nothing wrong about being nekkid. Everybody is, at least once in a while.

Now Paris and Britney? Y’all have something to apologize for. As long as Vanessa doesn’t follow the Lindsay path to early rehab she’ll be fine.

We’re all in this together, right? Don’t go with the quo, oh no.

(but, just for the record, after all this time there are still no photos of Emma Watson’s boobs)

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