christmas

Hi eveyone..

for the first time ever, we are home for Christmas. And I’m thinking I really like it.

What’s not to like?

Sleep in my own bed, a little too much.
No driving.
No juggling kids in someone else’s home.
No jumping up after an hour and saying “it’s time to go to the next house!”
No driving.
My own tools, batteries, and computer are handy.
My kids aren’t stressed being constantly told to “be good.”
Church in our parish (and there early enough for a seat!)
Opening gifts on our schedule, and as loudly as we want.
Relaxing.

Did I mention we aren’t driving anywhere?

Here’s the picture that should have been on our Christmas cards (had we, you know, made any).

Hope you and yours are well!

This morning I came as close to announcing “I’m cancelling Christmas!” as I ever have. All over something stupid.

I know - kids will be kids, and kids will fight over stupid things. I also know they better not fuck with me, because I make Tony Montana look pretty relaxed at this point.

So, anyway, to try and get back to the spirit and all that, here’s something stolen from Busy Mom:

1. Wrapping or gift bags?
   I like to wrap, but suck at it, so gift bags are cool. But nothing beats boxes under the tree (I have been known to put something sorta-obvious into another box, sometimes even with a brick, to throw off the folks that like to shake their gifts to figure out what they are)
2. Real or artificial tree?
   I like real ones but don’t like the needles in the carpet, etc. We have a pre-lit fake tree that is awesomely easy to mess with now.
3. When do you put up the tree?
   Thanksgiving weekend, usually (credit goes to my wife and kids, if it were just me, it would be December 23rd or so)
4. When do you take the tree down?
   January. Usually.
5. Do you like eggnog?
   Oh, hell yes. The best is sold at Braum’s, 100 miles from here. Yes, I buy some (from Braum’s) every year.
6. Favorite gift received as a child?
   I think I got my rock and roll lectric guitar for Christmas. That was during the time of my life known as “drug induced fog” so it all kinda runs together. But that was really, really cool.
7. Do you have a nativity scene?
   Yes, mostly child-proof right now.
8. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
   Probalbly the little thing with the wires designed to slice hard-boiled eggs. We rarely boil eggs, and at the time had a toddler who would like to have sliced his fingers off had he gotten hold of the thing.
9. Mail or email Christmas cards?
   Ha! I’ll pretend you didn’t say that (I’m a guy)
10. Favorite Christmas Movie?
    Christmas Story (I can’t put my arms down!) or maybe It’s a Wonderful Life.
11. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
    after I finish this list
12. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
    Divinity. Or cookies.
13. Clear lights or colored on the tree?
    Couldn’t care less.
14. Favorite Christmas song?
    Silent Night.
15. Travel at Christmas or stay home?
    This is the first year (since we were married 20 years ago) that we are staying home, out of necessity more than anything. Don’t know if it will ‘take’ or not.
16. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer.
    No, but Busy Mom did for me: Oh, I actually have to do it? OK: Dasher, Dance, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen. Rudolph, too.
17. Angel on the tree top or a star?
    Angel.
18. Open the presents Christmas Eve or Christmas Morning?
    Both. Gifts from each other in the evening (with eggnog) and then Santa comes overnight if we’ve been good.
19. Most annoying thing about this time of year?
    Idiots at the store.
20. Do you decorate your tree in any specific theme or color?
    Um, no. This morning I found a towel hanging on the tree. We’re lucky it’s standing.
21. What do you leave for Santa?
    Eggnog. And cookies.
22. Least favorite holiday song?
    I don’t really have one, but they all get on my nerves if I hear them too much (such as when the store plays nothing but Christmas music starting around Labor Day.)
23. Favorite ornament?
    One that isn’t broken. Yet.

Christmas break is the perfect time to tear up perfectly good (yet cluttered) living spaces and get ready to remodel. Or, so I hear.

And ‘remodel’ is our own cheapass way of doing it, we can’t afford a real rip-down-the-walls type of remodel, so today we are:

Replacing the kitchen faucet, which after a dozen years has begun leaking in ways that faucets shouldn’t

Re-organize our bedroom closet, and part of our bedroom, a process that began weeks ago

Drop off another case of books at Half Price Books and hope we actually leave the store with less books than we brought in. This time.

If any of this sounds like “chores” or “forced labor,” I need to add that Santa Claus came again at our house last night. Twice.

And I still haven’t lost the smile on my face…

Ah, it’s a weekend.

Carve the turkey, turn the ballgame on
Make bloody marys cause we all want one.
Send somebody to the Stop ‘N Go,
we need some celery and a can of fake snow,
a bag of lemons and some Diet Sprite,
a box of tampons and some Salem Lights.
Halleluja everybody say cheese,
Merry Christmas from the Family.

Feliz Navidad…