where was I

Somewhere during the past ten years or so I seem to have forgotten what the fuck I was doing with regards to this blog.  That’s not the only thing, but that’s one thing I guess.




The last year or two I’ve treated it like a rather expensive youtube channel, I really don’t think anyone gives a shit what song I think is cool at any given time, or that I remember seeing a band in concert or used to fuck to a certain album.  Seriously, nobody cares.


I’ll never have the writing chops of my blog friends and heroes that I still read.  I’m not smart enough for that, I don’t think, and I’m too lazy to really put the effort into this thing that would make it better.


So I don’t know what that leaves me.  I guess I’m using the process of elimination to sort out what I’m going to do here.


Here’s what I’m not: funny, sexy, cool, relaxed, relevant, interesting.  Nothing would be lost if I pulled the plug, and yet I hesitate.  (Same thing goes with my life, but that’s a bigger topic).  I like some of the things I have written over the years, I love some of the friends I have made.   I have a big pile of regrets, as well, since words can be weapons and I have violated the cardinal rule many times (First: Do no harm).


So, what to do.  (music again: If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice).   Maybe I should post my favorite recipes.  (trivia: way back when I started this I thought about writing about sex.  HA.  Gotta have a good imagination, right?)  Maybe I could post pictures or jokes.


Maybe I could just leave it alone.   Looking for inspiration in strange places.  We’ll see where that goes.