Somebody in Houston created this billboard, called “graffiti” by everyone. I call it “classic.”
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I’m helping my seven-year-old with his reading homework, and he has a set of sentences about a bear.
Only he keeps pronouncing it “beer.” “The beer slept on a rock.” “He saw a beer in the woods.” “The beer had brown fur and huge nasty sharp teeth.”
Is there anything it can’t do?
Tags: beer
Can’t leave my whining about gas prices at the top. Here’s another joke for ya, an oldie, and especially for my pal Y who I don’t chat with very much anymore 
The presidents of Miller, Coors, Anheuser-Busch, and Guinness were at an international beer conference. They decided to all go to lunch together and the waitress asked what they wanted to drink. The president of Miller said without hesitation, “I’ll have a Miller.” The president of Coors smiled and said, “I’ll have a Coors, brewed from pure mountain water!” The guy from Anheuser-Busch proudly said, “I’ll have a Budweiser, the King of Beers!” The guy from Guinness glanced at his lunch mates and said, “I’ll have a Coke.”
The others looked at him like he had sprouted a new head. He just shrugged and said, “If you guys aren’t drinking beer, then neither will I.”
Tags: beer
Tomorrow, or so, school starts for my boys. One will be a big second grader, the other starts kindergarten.
So of course, tonite was “meet the teacher” night. Heh. Where we say such nice things to each other as “how nice to meet you!” and “I can’t wait to talk to you again!” This is, of course, before school actually starts and the teachers call Constantine to come deal with your children. On the first day.
Afterward, since they had been so well behaved (and really, they had been. Behaved.), we took the kids to Wings and Such. Where I proceeded to try and teach my two year old to read:
Me: (pointing at mirrored sign) “Coors. Light. Coors Light.”
Child: Whips her hands in the air, shouts “Go, Illini!”
Wife: “Honey, he’s just trying to sell you on weak beer since you’re his only daughter.”
Me: “Can I teach her the joke about intercourse in a canoe?”
Wife: “No.”
Kid: (hands up) “Go, Illini!”
Etc. School starts tomorrow, y’all.