I flat out stole this from this awesome page. Only because I’m afraid I’ll lose the bookmark someplace and I want this for reference.

Detailed Hair Help

Now, here is a question, something like: “My child’s hair is so thick, very, very tight kinks, and it is always a battle to comb it. Should I cut it in a cute, short style?”

And…Nancy’s answer:

NO, DON’T CUT IT, if you do she’ll be considered ugly and you a bad parent by all the African-American adults and many of the AA children you meet!

Here’s some basics:

1. Don’t use ANY hair care products meant for ‘white’ hair — white hair tends to get oily, and all the products are made with this in mind. AA hair, on the other hand, is VERY DRY and if you use any of these products it will roughen up the cuticle of your child’s hair and make it impossible to get a comb through it. This applies to ALL products made for children’s and baby’s hair; they are some of the *worst* offenders.
2. DO go out and buy the following and do the following with it when you buy it:

1. A good, salon quality conditioner to compensate for the damage already done to your child’s hair; Redkin products are ideal, Climatress is excellent. Prepare for it to cost about $15., so you won’t be likely wanting everyone else to use it :). You won’t have to use it on your baby, either, once her hair is back in condition, but right now, she needs it — as evidenced by the fact that the ends are the way they are. Put it on after washing (more about that later), and *leave it in.*.
2. After putting on the Climatress, put regular Johnson&Johnson clear baby oil *on her scalp,* NOT on her hair. Put it on her whole scalp. Then, using a soft brush, brush her hair from the scalp out until all the hairs are covered with oil. USE A LOT. The worst thing that can happen if you use too much is that you wipe it off with a towel, but if you don’t use enough, her hair will show it… She should always, all day and all night, all the time, have enough oil (or hair grease, see below) on her hair for her hair to look shiny from it.
3. Also, buy some TCB hair grease, actually it’s called TCB Hair and Scalp Conditioner, its’ yellow, don’t get the blue or green stuff cuz it won’t wash out of clothes and you’re a beginner…
4. Okay, to wash it. Once it is in condition, any good shampoo will do, but right now, *it won’t.* Get some more Redkin stuff :), the gentlest SALON QUALITY shampoo they have for the *most* damaged hair. Wash her hair thoroughly, and then don’t use any more ‘white,’ baby, or bar shampoo on her head. Don’t rewash with shampoo, either, any oftener than once a week. If she gets food or whatever in her hair between washings, use clear water on a washcloth, or use as little shampoo as you can reasonably get away with, rinse *thoroughly,* and then recondition and re-oil as per above.
5. While you are out there buying all this hair stuff, buy a couple packages of those little plastic barrettes that you see little Black girls wearing. Also, buy some little rubber bands, those little red and blue and yellow ones, or they also have packages of little black ones if you are by the Black hair care products. WAIT!! Don’t try to put these rubber bands into her hair just like that… they’ll break it off for sure. Just buy them, and read on… smiling, here.
6. Also buy one of those wide tooth plastic Goody combs that you see teenage girls with hair down to their waist using, the ones with the smooth, broad teeth (no, not a pick, the real combs) and the rounded wide handle. After washing her hair, use this to *gently* pick tangles out of your baby’s hair. Plan for it to take several sessions, as she is almost sure to hate it. After awhile, you’ll get better at this, and you’ll be able to do it when she is on the move or asleep — sort of like you learned to do with dressing and diapering, LOL.
7. Once you get the tangles out, sit your baby between your knees, and part her hair down the middle, from her forehead all the way to the nape of her neck. Take one section and twist it until you can clip it out of your way. Now, part the remaining hair down the middle, from the crown of her head to her ear. Take one of *those* sections, and secure it the same way you did the other one. DON’T USE RUBBER BANDS. If her hair is too thick even after conditioning to fit in a small rubber band, use one of those butterfly clips — guess you’ll need to buy that, too :).
8. Open the TCB. Put one of the little rubber bands on your finger, and *dip your finger into the grease.* Roll the rubber band around until it is completely coated with grease. THIS WILL KEEP THE RUBBER BAND FROM BREAKING OFF YOUR BABY’S HAIR. Now, draw the comb through the section of hair that is still loose, being careful to start at the scalp and go all the way to the ends. If it tangles, then start with the ends, when they are done, move in a little more, keep that up until you get all the way to the scalp. It is important that you get every single tangle, cuz they’ll get A LOT worse — we call this ‘nappy’ — if you don’t do it right.
9. Now, gently twist the section, and put the rubber band on it to make it into a good pony tail. The hair at the scalp should be smooth, but practice makes perfect :).
10. Gently comb out the pony tail. Divide it into three sections, and braid them as tightly as you know how.
11. When you get to the end, put a little grease on the ends, and then *wrap them around the straight part of the barrette.* Then snap it shut.
12. Do all the sections the same way.
13. You gotta do all this again tomorrow, so soon you WILL get good at it! You’ll know when you are *really* good because Black people will start asking you who did her hair

Hope this helps. Email Nancy Belk if you have any questions. And please, don’t cut that little girl’s hair…