It doesn’t matter whether you win or lose… It’s how drunk you get*

I was running one morning, and out of the darkness (from somebody’s front porch, I guess) came this:

What the fuck are you doing, dude? Running this time of night. It’s like two o’clock in the morning!

The sun came up about the time I finished my run. I think my young friend follows the philosophy of “avoid hangovers – stay drunk.”

*anyone know who I’m quoting?

Eager for your wisdom

Okay, dear reader(s), I have a question for you: How do you teach someone how to swing?

Seriously! This is driving me nuts.

Okay, not swing like Java programming, and not the Jazz scene, and not the grown-up version of swinging. I’m talking sitting on a swing and moving oneself.

Oh, sure, I have kids who can swing very well. They’ve somehow overcome my attempts to actually teach them and figured it out on their own. But my little girl? Is especially stubborn. (anyone just tuning in, I’ve also had a few foster kids over the years, so I’ve probably managed to get ten kids or more swinging at one time or another. No, not on the same swingset).

The problem seems to be in the leg movements. If I say “kick your legs” I’ll get one of a dozen different motions, none of which help the actual swingishness. If I say “stick your legs out” that gets a different (yet still somehow not quite right) response.

So is there a magic thing? I say “look at your brother.” Doesn’t help.

Gah!

It’s not that I don’t want to spend time at the swingset with my dear daughter, it’s that she weighs 40 something pounds and pushing her for up to an hour (yes) can make my shoulders hurt. So I’m trying to empower her to do it on her own.

Any ideas?