Watching a movie the other day, set in Newcastle. Where they talk funny, y’all.
Son: “Dad, what does ‘shite’ mean?”
(we have the subtitles on, naturally, doesn’t everyone?)
Me: (always thinking fast on my feet) “Take off the ‘e’.”
Son: !!
Yes, I imagine my wife will be real happy about this. But at least I didn’t answer him when he asked what “shag” meant…
If it happens on Larry King “live,” it isn’t news.
If Gupta says something how to wash our hands, it isn’t news.
If one of your other hacks (the one for or the one against immigration, whatever) says something, it isn’t news.
If Nancy Grace cries on camera for the umpteenth time about some poor little kid that had something bad happen, it isn’t news.
These are opinions. Almost as real as ‘the Bachelor.’
Quit trying to be (as bad as) Fox. You’re sucking.
Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.
*** Confucius (551 BC – 479 BC) Chinese Philosopher ***
Yeah, he might have been on to something. But isn’t everything we see telling us just the opposite?
You need a better car, that has more horsepower! So you can sit in traffic? NO! You don’t see cars in traffic in new car ads, you see them driving on the open road, getting there. Faster. Traffic is for slow people who don’t drive shiny new cars.
You need a new computer! (tell me you haven’t seen a new ad for a computer somewhere online today). A faster computer, that has more features! It’ll help you do all your work faster.
You need an HDTV. Because, hell, I don’t know, they’re cool, I guess. It won’t let you watch your shows faster, but you’ll be able to see all those details that you are missing now because you have a crummy non-HDTV. And next year, you’ll need to get an ultra HDTV. Just because.
Why, exactly, am I ranting about all of this? Probably because I haven’t even considered shopping for Christmas yet.