exercise

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blowing bubbles

August 6, 2009 in Blog news by Ben | 1 comment

One thing I struggle with, along with my weight, is just how to exercise in such a fashion that I don’t get burned out or hurt or both.

When you are chunky, like me, normal things like jumping jacks or pushups can turn painful really quickly. It’s easy to pull a muscle running, or get knee / ankle / foot / back pain. Sports are awesome, because of the commitment and camaraderie and all that, but they increase the risk of injury, too. I’m also not as young as I used to be, and that isn’t helping any.

My mental game goes something like this: “I ran yesterday, so I need to take a rest day.”

So far, so good, but then the next morning I get up at 5:00 AM and think “Hey, my ankle’s a little sore, maybe I better not run on it today, I’ll take another rest day.”

Next morning: “Wow, I shouldn’t have had that glass of wine last night, I slept right through the alarm and now there isn’t time to run.”

Do you sense a pattern here? End result: I’m not running enough.

Setting goals is all well and good, but I’m doing really lousy at keeping to those goals. And with the perfect excuse of “I don’t want to overdo it,” I’m pretty badly sucking at this get in shape effort.

Meanwhile, I have found a great activity that doesn’t put a lot of stress on knees, ankles, etc. Swimming laps. We already go to the pool just about daily to beat the heat and get the kids a little worn out. And while looking for suggestions (another thing I do: read too much about everything. Reading, usually, has a small risk of injury, I have found) And I found an awesome description of why exercise (swimming, in this case, but any exercise) is awesome for you.

Consider the purpose. Simply enough, it is just to increase the amount of oxygen you can absorb, thereby enabling you to continue exercise without stopping. It is the definition of fitness. Specifically, you want to increase the surface area of your lungs’ alveoli and multiply your mitochondria. Imagine the surface of the interior of your lungs as bubble wrap. You want the same area divided into more bubbles. The mitochondria multiply because you respond to their demand for more oxygen rich blood with a refusal, infuriating the hungry little organelles which then enlarge and multiply to meet your needs.

(and I’m skipping a bit)

Now, about this breathing and discomfort business. No gasping and no 100% efforts at this stage. This should be constructive exercise, NOT do or die. Will there come a day when you are completely relaxed and breathing gently and easily throughout the swim? Not really. The wish to be a bit better, which in aerobic sports like swimming and running means faster, remains with us. As we improve, most of us strive harder and continue to raise our heart rates, so there is always a bit of panting. It feels good. Yes, it is actually a pleasure to work out hard, to feel used up at the end of the swim. Oddly enough, most of find that we are more productive during the rest of the day as a result of working out.

From Ruth Kazez. Look around her web page, ’tis awesomeness.

I need to keep at this exercise thing, to do something. Cuz I think staying fat is probably the worst choice I can make.

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sub dude

January 13, 2009 in Fat Guy by Ben

I wrote about three drafts last night, but nothing worth hitting ‘publish.’

You’ve probably heard about the crash yesterday, yes, that’s just a couple miles from our house. Our kids are concerned, mostly my daughter, for the crew of the helicopter. She also wanted to be assured that we were not flying a helicopter to the wedding. We did not know any of the personnel involved, but it is hearbreaking nonetheless.

Once again, I’m considering what changes I need to make in my life. Nothing, again, to put here, at least not at this point. On the plus side I did the stoopid stability ball exercises again last night, this time without children assisting / laughing, and it went OK. No, I’m not any more stable, and it takes weeks to build muscle, but I think the stretching and activity does me some good each time. I’m more aware of different muscles in my torso / back, and now when I do the exercises it isn’t a nail biter to go down stairs (which is good). I still pull down the blinds so nobody can see me doing the “Ball Cobra” move (if I weren’t infertile, I swear we’d have little stability balls on the way, if you get the picture).

Seen any good movies lately? If you were on twitter last night, you know I watched “Zombie Strippers,” and it had me so involved that I was on twitter, too. 94 minutes long, and probably could have been done in 9.

From the movie: Zombie Jenna Jameson, talking to customer at strip club: “You’re cute. I could just eat you up.”

You’ll never guess what happens next. Yeah.

I watch them so you don’t have to, peoples.

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This and that comes and goes

January 7, 2009 in Fat Guy, Kids, Movies by Ben | 4 comments

I did the stability ball routine again last night. Less sore than I was the first time. Yay.

Our family is flying to a wedding next week. We’ll get to see some relatives that we don’t get to see very often, due to eddys in the space time continuum.

The sun is shining, again, for a couple days. Next cold front just in time for the weekend (‘natch).

Also, holy shit, our family is flying to a wedding next week!

I’m trying to keep things in perspective. If Ted Nugent can make it to sixty, maybe I can, too.

Usually, by now I have some kind of must see movie for the summer. But I cannot think of one. Sure, there’s “Race to Witch Mountain,” which I’ll probably watch with the kids (I was their age when the first one came out, probably why I like aliens and blondes still). May has Star Trek and Terminator Salvation. This summer has another Transformer movie and 2012 (and who doesn’t love a movie about the world ending?) We have to wait until practically Christmas for the new Chipmunks flick.

Anything you wanna see?

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Lunging unsteadily into the new year

January 6, 2009 in Fat Guy by Ben | 2 comments

Yeah, there’s this whole blog thing sitting here and I never seem to be using it.

Guess what? Go ahead, guess.

I’ll give you a hint: I’m sick (again) of being a lard ass (still).

That’s right! It’s time for a new exercise / fitness plan. Probably the 42nd time I’ve started one. Or so.

(we pause while I do something useful for a bit)

Okay, am back.

Here’s the deal on my latest attempt to rid myself of a lard-ass. I need to start hitting the street again (running), and I bought a stability ball.

Yes, you read that right. When you’re done laughing, we’ll continue.

(still waiting)

Okay, had your fun? Now, I bought the ball (“Gold’s Gym” brand) because, I’m not making this up, it is an “anti-burst” ball, and well, I’m up to the challenge, I think. (and yeah, I’m 30 pounds over the maximum weight to use it, so what’s your point?)

It came with a giant poster showing exercises (which I’ve already misplaced) and a DVD featuring a young woman that could probably break me in half showing some stretches and a basic workout.

The other day I put in the DVD. The stretching portion damn near killed me, but we got through it. (I say “we” because I have kids, and it is endlessly amusing to them to watch their old man work out with The Ball. “Shamu, Shamu!” they will shout randomly, and clap politely when I get a trick right).

Next, there’s a 30 minute workout. Some exercises are easy. For instance, I did the squats with nary a problem (hold the ball, squat, stand up). On the other hand, the reverse lunges were almost the death of me, and about the only reason I made it through was my bad form combined with the fact that if I held the ball up in the air like they wanted me too I would have smashed it into the ceiling fan.

The young lady on the video is outside. On a golf course or something. No ceiling fan.

Somewhere in between is the crunches and something where I lay on my stomach (which isn’t really that easy to do) and put the ball behind my legs. And (my kids will vouch for this), you haven’t lived until you see me try and do the Cobra on a stability ball. Oh hells yes, I will learn some balance, or break something, one.

Ultimately, I survived my first brush with the stability ball. It stays in the living room, near the playstation, and the kids have fun rolling around on it while shooting aliens or whatever. But tonite – I’m going to try another workout. If you don’t hear from me, I’m probably in traction somewhere.

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