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Did you ever notice I only write anymore when things are going like utter crap?
Huh.
I’m trying not to wallow, or dwell, or whatever the fuck I do. Which means I avoid this place lately. But dayum if I wasn’t hit by a wall of ‘what the fuck’ tonite.
Yeah, well, that’s all for now, I’ve got some things to do. Maybe I’ll come actually write something more than once every six months.
BTW, before anyone gets alarmed, the subject line is a quote from Marving the Paranoid Android.
If you don’t know who Marvin is, lemme know, we’ll send you in the right direction.
Here’s another cool poem from Marvin:
Now the world has gone to bed,
Darkness won’t engulf my head,
I can see by infrared,
How I hate the night.
Now I lay me down to sleep,
Try to count electric sheep,
Sweet dream wishes you can keep,
How I hate the night.
See, I put these in here because it makes whatever I say seem bright and cheery in contrast.
Tags: crap, depression, marvin
I so badly want to be able to do it. To not be angry.
Thich Nhat Hahn
But then comes a day like yesterday (which is continuing this morning) and crap, anger seems too mild to describe how I’m feeling.
And no, this is nothing in the online world, this is in the real world, where my child has done something incredibly stupid but also scary and we are now back in the mode of reacting and doubting our parenting. I’ll know more today about the whole Permanent Record part, but for now I’m just so mad I can’t see straight.
(my apologies to anyone coming by today and hoping for a joke or a comic or whatever. Maybe later)
Oh, yeah, and according to this prophetic blog, today does indeed suck.
Tags: anger-management, crap, parenting